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Quarterlife Queer

A never ending story

An Open Letter to those I call Friend:

Today (thanks to Oprah and her final show) I have been thinking about how caught up I get in the crisis and chaos in my life.. how sometimes I get so focused on finding a solution to the problem that I don’t learn from it. Sometimes I get so caught up going down the path that I THINK has been set up for me or that I WANT to be for me..that I miss all the signs that tell me that i’m going the wrong way.

I don’t make resolutions at the beginning of the year… I kind of feel like they either fail miserably because there is no real intention behind them or they pave the way for me to be clinging to the wrong path simply because I don’t want to fail.  But at the beginning of this year I sat in a spiritual circle and set an intition to give up the need to control my life and all the situations in it.

I wouldn’t say I’ve failed at that intention.. I think I just forgot about it.

I also think I forgot about giving myself permission to be honest..to be myself.. to have my own opinions and make them heard..to disagree..to know that who I am is important to someone and that someone is ME! And..to know that being honest..no matter who doesn’t like my truth..it is MY truth and that I hurt myself more by not living in it to protect others than I could ever hurt other’s by living something they don’t like.

So here I am.. reminding myself that I am suppose to be working on not trying to control my life..working on taking a moment to step out of crisis and chaos to learn the lesson instead of controlling the solutions and outcomes…working on living MY truth no matter how different it is from those around me..

And if you are reading this.. I just ask that you call me out if you find me caught up..stressed out..lying about myself.

A swift kick in the ass is appreciated. 🙂

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